faith salie on maternal ambivalence
Against all odds, Faith Salie got pregnant for the first time at age 41. Since she had always wanted a baby, Faith was shocked to discover her own ambivalence about finally becoming a mom. Here's an excerpt from her piece on The Huffington Post:
I'm blue because I'm scared about how utterly my life will change, and I'm sad about saying goodbye to my soon-to-be old life. Not in the cynical way that smug parents warn, "Say goodbye to your life!" as in say sayonara to sleep and spontaneity and romance and a perky rack.
No, I mean that I really love my life just the way it is. This life, in my 40s, is a life I've forged and prayed for and fought for and created and adjusted. I've lost a mother and a marriage. I've changed my career and settled, alone, in the greatest city in the world. I've met the love of my life and am acutely grateful for him every day. I know how much sleep I need, how much time on the elliptical I need and how much chocolate that buys me. I also know how little I need to make me happy, ironically blessed as I am to be surrounded with just about everything I've ever wanted. Paradoxically, falling in love with my husband made me think, for the first time, that I'd be okay if I never had a baby at all. Without children, he and I could make up for spending the first four decades of our lives apart.
And now there's this kid coming in to shake things up. [Full story at The Huffington Post.]
We love Faith's fearless candor. Do you?