Parenting

school punishes dress code violators with public shaming

 

Friend of Ricki Melissa Brodsky: As parents, we are horrified when we hear of other parents publicly humiliating their children because of poor choices, whether it be grades, drugs or inappropriateness on social media channels. We take to our FB and Twitter accounts to raise fists in solidarity, we’d NEVER do this to our children nor would we allow anyone else to even consider taking actions such as this when it comes to our little babies. Parents swear in the comment sections that they would choose different path of consequence, public shaming isn’t the route to take.  Alternative suggestions come up, things like taking away the technological devices, hire tutors or duct tape. One thing is certain, we would never want that look, the one where the kid is absolutely horrified and mortified, to ever cross the faces of our own children.

dress code violation

Photo by Melissa Brodsky

Now, it seems public shaming our children has become the new punishment for dress code violations at the school district my children attend high school in, here in suburbia Michigan.

Our district is trying to ban yoga pants and skinny jeans, particularly when they are worn inappropriately. And by inappropriately, I mean with little tiny shirts and a large skin gap in between the bottom of the shirt and the top of the pant, a skin belt.

I’m all for banning the yoga pant and skinny jean thing. Well, not banning per se. More like, limiting them into extinction—particularly when the girls seem to like to flaunt their cracks and expose their belly buttons. Even on a lovely young body, it’s still not a good look.

The school dress code is described in the code of conduct book.

Inappropriate Dress and Grooming

A student will not dress or groom in a manner that disrupts the educational process or is detrimental to the health, safety or welfare of others. 

A student will not dress in a manner that is distractive or indecent, to the extent that it interferes with the learning and teaching process. This includes wearing apparel that displays messages which tend to condone or depict, in a positive sense, drugs, alcohol, sexual themes, vulgarity, violence or other subjects which are inconsistent with the district’s policies or this Code.

There's nothing about the yoga, skinny, midriff-baring garb. Although, I seem to recall a ListServ going out to the parents, letting them know that the district finds kids' styles these days to be offensive and, if they are caught wearing too tight, too short clothing with or without words running across the butt, a phone call will go out and parents will need to come in and bring a change of clothes to the suspect.

It seems those rules have recently changed. Now, the offensive, code-breaking student has to wear a LARGE purple t-shirt with the words “Dress Code Violator” in HUGE pink letters.

Really? Kids are going to learn a lesson? This is nothing more than bullying, in my opinion. Public shaming the students…kids…for dressing inappropriately in order to try to modify their behavior. I completely understand the need for some sort of consequence, the styles (if you can even call them that) aren’t appropriate for school. Personally, I don’t even think they’re appropriate for malls, movies, restaurants, and basically any public place. Except maybe street corners. Yeah, there’s that. The responsibility does begin with the parent, particularly if the kid doesn’t care enough to take responsibility for their own actions.  And perhaps parents should rethink clothing purchases, particularly for school wardrobe.

I’m the mother of two teenager daughters who wear the teen uniform of yoga pants, Uggs and some type of shirt. They top it off with a North Face jacket. But, when they leave this house to go out in public, their stomachs, vaginas and butt cracks are completely covered. Although, what they do with they leave the overprotective line of my vision (eyes in the back of my head included), I am not privy to that information.

The point is I realize something needs to be done. Parents and students aren’t stepping up and taking ownership. But, this new t-shirt punishment crosses the line into invasion of privacy and bullying.

What’s next, forcing kids to stand on display in the cafeteria during lunchtime? Or worse... outside the school, by the road, as a warning to others that this, too, could happen to your child if he or she comes to school dressed inappropriately?

What is your opinion on the shaming t-shirts for dress code violators?

Melissa Brodsky has been sharing too much of her life online for the past seven years at Rock and Drool. She recently co-founded a social media company aptly titled Smart Savvy Social. When Melissa isn't cleaning up after her 5 kids, 1 husband, 6 cats, 2 dogs and various other household pests, she can be found obsessively twittering as @RockDrool or status updating over on Facebook.

 

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